Bulletproof: The True Life Exploits of an Urban Superhero

In Defense of Jon Stewart: An Open Letter to FOX "News"

2011-07-04T17:09:00.000-07:00

Dear FOX "News",

I just wanted to say "Thank you". Thank you for all that you do to bring the absurd to light and make clear that which is cleverly hidden by reason and accountability...

You recent media blitz insinuating that Jon Stewart is defaming Herman Cain because he's Black could not have made it more clear just how hypocritical your tagline "fair and balanced" is. Perhaps it is because you're working under a different definition of "fair and balanced" than the rest of the world uses, maybe your commentators have no journalistic integrity that makes them do more than read off cue cards instead of actually examining the merits of statements, or, and this is my favorite, perhaps your entire network escaped from the Bizarro world of Superman comics where everything is the opposite. I'm really banking on this last one because I know where we can get a whole case of Blue Kryptonite to solve this whole thing, quick snap and in a hurry.

Oh, would that it were that easy to defenestrate an entity with the parasitic impact that you have on the body that is the United States of America.

But I digress...

Stop it. Please just stop it.

You are a cancer on the very conscience of our country. Not because you represent a conservative viewpoint, not because you go after those you view as liberal and "left leaning", but because you consistently omit facts, stretch the truth and frame the simplest of things in the most heinous light possible in order to forward your agenda and scare people into following you.

You are fraudulent and a blatant lie that has been perpetrated on the American people.

I hope this is clear and understandable. I'm trying to think of what you would say in this instance and then express the opposite...just so I can express a balanced and fair viewpoint.

To be clear, I love the Daily Show and the Colbert Report.

I think Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert are two of the funniest and smartest people in media today, more importantly, they are honest and they have integrity, something which seems to have excused itself from the FOX "News" studios right around the time we started trading in CDs for MP3s. I went to the Rally, I watch the show, but more importantly, I trust them because they are honest about their intentions, their information and what they do.

Oh, and you can actually verify what they say on their shows with reference, sources and research.

The same, unfortunately, cannot be said for FOX "News".

"With great power there must also come great responsibility." A comic book taught me that. A fictional cartoon character espouses a principle so basic yet it escapes the grasp of your network. FOX "News" has one of the largest spheres of influence in the world, but it is squandered away on propoganda and malicious political rhetoric cloaked in the label of "fair and balanced".

So Jon Stewart made fun of Herman Cain and he's a Black man. I'm a Black man and I make fun of Herman Cain. More to the point, I am a fellow Morehouse Man and if Herman Cain were the standard, I would be ashamed to call myself one. But he isn't. He is a sad example of how a significant segment of the Republican party, the Tea Party and FOX "News" continue to use African Americans for their own agenda, not because any of you care about the issues of African Americans but simply because it is expedient and you somehow got the impression that we're all interchangeable.

Expressing an alternative viewpoint is not only healthy, but needed to ensure balance in our world...lying about it, falsely representing yourself in this light knowing full well that all your rhetoric is to cover the agenda you have is so bereft of morals, Rod Blagojevich would back off.

With great power, does come great responsibility and as such, FOX "News", you have a responsibility to your viewers, more importantly to the American people, to stop the intentional misdirection, stop the misleading information and honestly and accurately report the news using actual facts, not something Karl and Sarah put together on a bus ride over. You have a responsibility to be honest, truthful and act with integrity.

So I am writing this, and I'm asking you, FOX "News", to just say "no" and put away the falsehoods, put away the misrepresentation, to put away the lies and be forthright as a news organization should. Because Jon Stewart has done nothing but be fair and balanced in the truest sense of the words, even when having to report on issues that hit close to home.

So you have a choice. You can step up to the plate and do the right thing, or you can continue down a path that will further erode your reputation, sensibility and whatever remains of principles in your studio. The choice is yours, but whichever route you go, leave the hatchet jobs alone. Like him or not, Jon Stewart has been the consummate professional, even when dealing with your network. Stick to battling CNN and MSNBC, rather than using a whole network to attack one man, because, quite frankly, you aren't in his league.

Sincerely,

Jonathan Palmer

If Fox News Is Singing Your Praises, That Should Be A Sign...

2010-10-25T22:39:00.000-07:00

and not a good one either...

The recent firing of Juan Williams over some personal profiling comments he made on Fox "News" which subsequently resulted in his being hired by Fox "News" got me to thinking. When I first heard, I wasn't shocked since in our overly PC-ed world, you usually cannot say "boo" in a venue or enclave without getting three complaints against you for defaming the cultural identity of "living challenged Americans" (hey, I worked in a Halloween reference...go me!), but I wasn't sure it was warranted...that is until I started hearing Karl Rove and friends singing his praises like he was the ice cream man and they had just gotten their allowance...and that gave me pause.

See, I like Lou Reed as much as the next person, and don't mind taking a "walk on the wild side" every once in awhile...it's the "Crazy-and-Evil-Side" bus tour where I like to pull the chord and ask the bus driver to let me off.

And if Karl Rove is talking about you like he's giving your eulogy, well, then you're already in the ninth level...

Realistically, Juan's switch is like going from Broadway to the WWF. You're still acting, one of them just has a little more credibility...the simple fact that they call themselves Fox "News" when it's clearly not, should be a clue...

It won't be long now before Bill O'Reilly shows up in a feathered boa and some Zubaz to challenge Wolf Blitzer to a cage match.

But I digress.

When the Dark Lor- I mean, Karl Rove is all over you like white on rice in a glass of milk on a paper plate in a snow storm, I tend to ask a few questions and after looking into things a little more, I can't say that Juan's firing was right or wrong...but as Chris Rock said, now I understand.

See Fox "News" and NPR arguably represent opposite ends of the spectrum and Juan liked to play on both sides of the fence. This was not his first incident of conflict with NPR or controversy. He'd also been a contributor since 1997 on Fox, appear on many of the shows, most notably the O'Reilly Factor where he'd even been a guest host...(guest host?!?!?) Fox loves this kind of thing. Any time they can take a moderate or liberal and turn them to the dark side, even a little like having them straddle the fence, it's a victory. If you can infect light with one sliver of darkness...that darkness will grow, as it did for Juan.

NPR, on the other hand, and I believe rightly so, hates this kind of thing.

Not in the least because the chances of cleansing someone of the bile that is Fox "News" is like curing a terminal disease, miraculous. I mean for all our efforts, all we've managed to get is Alan Colmes (not Alan Keyes, thank God. Really, you all can keep all of that right over there, we have enough crazy on this side).

But the two key points that I think bear noting:

1. Juan has been straddling this fence for too long. You can't "dance with the Devil in the pale moon light" and go to church on Sunday as if nothing has happened, and in this day and age with the culture war that's underway, you can't afford to stand on the sidelines anymore, you have to pick side, X-Men or Brotherhood, and roll with it;

2. With great power comes great responsibility...Juan is certainly entitled to his opinion, but as someone who millions of people listen to and whom Fox would exploit, he has a responsibility to be more judicious in his timing, words and phrasing. Juan's been doing this for a long time and he was well aware of the sensationalistic impression and sound bite that would be created by his "stating his fear", and could have made his point a dozen other ways...why, then, didn't he?
Further having been around Fox before and knowing their racist anti-Muslim sentiment that permeates every broadcast, ever show and every commentator the way your best friend in college puking in the back of your car and then leaving it in the hot Sun for 3 days does your upholstery, he knew they would take this ball and run with it.

And they have.

They have been all over their 24-hour "news" channel calling for a cessation to funding, attacking NPR, wild accusations of racism against them...and Juan has stayed silent...well, except to defend himself and promote his narrative. I get that he's angry. I know he's not happy with them, but responsibly he should be telling Fox to stand down; to allow this to used to attack an institution that he supposedly has believed in and supported like NPR is stepping to the side, standing by and letting the crap happen. Even in the face of adversity, if you're on the sides of the angels, you step up and step in to ensure what's right happens. You don't stand idly by and you don't let setbacks stop you...

There's a battle going on right now for the soul of America. It is being waged on the airwaves and the internet and in the corner store. Fox "News" and the far Right are not merely acting irresponsibly, they are actively and hypocritically undermining our country; more specifically, they are strategically disseminating misinformation to tear asunder the fabric of the very country that they claim to love because it doesn't fit their outdated "old timey" image of what should be...

And we, moderate and liberal, we open-minded have a responsibility to counter this sabotage, to stand against this tyranny that is being thrust upon us and say "No More!" We have a responsibility to pick a side and fight on that side with every strength of sinew we may muster to ensure our country is that which it is meant to be. A shining beacon of hope and truth that is open to everyone.

Coming out of the Bush Administration, we've been dirty for a long while, it's about time we got clean.

It's about time we ante up and kick in.

It's about time WE take our country back from the insanity that has gripped in through fear and prejudice and brave-behind-the-teleprompter sycophants and narcissists.

It's time.

Wake Up America, It's Time To Ante Up and Kick In...

2010-10-10T00:12:00.000-07:00

It's been a long time,I shouldn't have left you, without a strong rhyme to step to; think of how many weak shows you slept through, time's up, sorry I kept you...
-I Know You Got Soul, Eric B. & Rakim

I picked that quote by Erik B. & Rakim because it has been a long time since I've written, and when I look at all of the insanity that has gone on around that I might have helped to stem the tide of, I cannot help but feel remorse for not being here when I should have. So from now, at least until the election, I'm going to write as much as I can to show my supporty and loyalty to our President and to our country.

So lend me your ears, my Fellow Americans, for I have words that I would impart to our country...Because that's what it this is about, OUR country.

Recently, our President said something that struck a chord within me:

"It is inexcusable for any Democrat or progressive right now to stand on the sidelines in this midterm election."

Inexcusable.

Unable to be excused.

Unjustifiable.

Unpardonable...

Indefensible.

The mission may not be accomplished, but the message has been received. Time to ante up and kick in...

You see, as someone who has severe constraints on his time, there is often a lot I can't do to get some skin in the game...I don't have the free time to do doorknocking and phone calling; lit dropping does not go well with my plantar faciitus and in this tight economy, there is only so much fundraising one can do...

But, I can write.

I can write and say the things that need to be said. Things that must be said and are not. Things that need to be heard.

And so, I am answering our President's call, to do what needs to be done in the way that I can...by writing. For in writing, I can speak truth to power, I can say what needs to be said, and hopefully, just hopefully, snap some people out of the Matrix-like slumber they have descended into.

Our country has been besieged by terrorists from within, small minded hysterics with delusions of grandeur that prey upon the fears of the populace, igniting blind rage and panic that have loosed an evil upon our country, heretofore unknown...

When did this all change?

When did it become okay to dress up racism as patriotism and avoid culpability?

When did it become okay to limit the diversity between us and call it "family values"?

When did it become okay to shout epithets and and spew intolerance under the guise of protecting freedom?

When did America, stop being America?

It did not, but we have been asleep at the wheel.

We have nodded off in the dead of night, threatening to veer into the ditch of ignorance and lose our way along this path.

We must wake up. WAKE UP!

Our Founding Fathers held to be self evident that all men (people) are created equal, and that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights, chief among them being life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness...

In case you didn't realize, that means you can marry whoever you damn well please, regardless of race, color, creed, gender or orientation. There was no asterisk on the Declaration of Independence with a footnote that said: "except 'those' people." To deny this nullif ies your ability to wave the flag and cry freedom.

America, beyond the colonialism that devasted the indigenous people, carried within its founding the principle of religious freedom away from persecutions...

In case you didn't realize, that means that you can build a mosque wherever you damn well please, and standing against this invalidates your right to call yourself a patriot.

They also incorporated into the Constitution the manner and balloting for electing the President and which, when followed, rests the fate of the Country on this one person.

In case you didn't realize, that means that whether you voted for him or not, he IS the President of the United States and should be afforded the same rights, privileges and responsibilities as any before him. To disrespect the man, is to disrespect the office, which is to disrespect the Constitution, and within that, the Country. That does not make you an American, it makes you a coward...

We cannot be the Land of the Free, while any amongst us must hide or deny who they are for fear of retribution.

We cannot be the Home of the Brave, if we are so frightened by culture and individuals that are different from us that we cease to stand up for the founding principles of America--Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness.

We cannot call ourselves America and not embody and exemplify these principles...principles which only truly count when they're not convenient, when you have to struggle and sacrifice to support them, when you have to stand for them.

So here I stand.

This is a serious time, and we need serious people. Sarah Palin, Glen Beck, your 15 minutes are up. Stop wasting the time of the American people and find a new gig...maybe something in the exciting electronics field or check out Brown College...

Really.

Tea Party, you want to take this country back, then start moving forward and understand that it is not enough to put on a tricorner hat and yell, you have to have substance, and actually study your history.

America, stop following whatever talking head pops up with an idea about a fence or following the money (as long as it doesn't connect to them) and begin to look at the truth behind the rhetoric and shouting to see who is really pulling the strings.

Wake up!

Wake up my country, my fellow Americans, and come together now. Cast aside the tyranny of ignorance and recognize the folly in the ways of the past. Be true to the principles on which we were founded, be true to the best of what is in us, be true to the ideal of what is must mean to be an American...Stand with pride, act with honor and live with integrity.

Wake up and be "one together America", with all the differences of opinion and thought that entails, but with civil discourse and honest debate.

Wake up because we are ONE country and it is time we started acting like it.

(Re)Birth of a Nation

2009-09-09T17:46:00.000-07:00

I used to think that our country had reached the magnitude of which I could be ashamed.

Under George W. Bush (or as I call it, the Dark Ages), I thought, foolishly, that the practices and policies which went far beyond free market economics and defending our shores had descended to the lowest depths of reflecting that which is ugly about our country. That which exists as the dark underbelly, tarnishing the bright shining light that is America, land of the free, home of the brave...

I'm sad to say that I was wrong.

I watched the Presidential Address tonight, and was appalled to watch as Republicans held up signs, and legislation, and sat intentionally in their seats, even while Republican-favored platforms were put forth...and one arrogant soul (Representative Joe Wilson, R-SC, who has changed his official Congressional website (http://www.joewilson.house.gov/) so that it only posts his bio and removes contact information, however you can find the contact form here and contact information for him here) called him a liar...

and I was ashamed, once more, to be an American.

Not because there is discord or disagreement amongst politicians, not because they don't wish to support the positions or bills that the President puts forth, but because of the fundamental disrespect inherent in the casual disregard they show for the highest office in the land and the leader of our country. A disrespect and disregard that has never, EVER been there before.

Ever.

But let's be honest, when looking at the 44 Presidents next to each other, it's clear that as they used to sing on Sesame Street, "one of these things is not like the others, one of these things just doesn't belong..."

Or so some would have you believe.

And though it may be couched in terms such as protecting us against socialism, high taxes and death panels, the reality is they believe they are protecting us from something much more dangerous...the Negro!!!!

In 1915 DW Griffith released his "groundbreaking" masterpiece, Birth of a Nation, widely hailed for its technical innovations in camerawork, achievement of the visual language of the cinema and solidification of "Blockbuster"/feature length films...which almost makes you forget that it's a racist piece of propaganda original called the Clansmen and used as a recruiting film for the KKK on into the 70s....

Beginning to see the connection?

No?

Let's step a little further into the Wayback machine and see if history does, in fact, repeat itself.

See the Clansmen--sorry, Birth of a Nation, tells the "heroic" story of how the KKK "saved" the South and by extension the country from the tyrannical rule of Northern (aka East Coast Elite) oppression, and "Negroes" run amuck. The film depicts the common fantasy that African Americans in positions of power, not only have no right to be in office but also disgrace the noble profession through wanton disregard for protocol and sophistication and a socialist agenda to take over the jobs and resources of hard working, upright White people in a gluttony of avarice and sloth. The KKK is so powerful as to move former union and confederate soldiers to join forces against the menace that is...the Negro and his willing White accomplices....routing those forces of evil and saving the country... (like maybe in 2012...)

well, for good upstanding White folk that is...

And now you flash forward to 2009, and that nightmare has become a reality.

The apocalypse has come.

The end of the world is nigh.

For the anti-Christ sits on his throne....

Really???

And every one of them secretly wishes to be "the Little Colonel" (look it up), standing against the wave of Negro injustice and propogation, garnering the forces to deliver the country from the clutches of this modern day Silas Lynch.

Unfortunately, this phantom menace, bent on destroying the country through Health Care Reform and Stimulus packages is no more real than the fiction of Birth...it is a weak attempt at couching the underlying racism that permeates through the hearts and minds of some of our citizenry, given voice through false "teabagging movements" and "average unscripted Americans" showing up at town halls; voices that ring hollow with the taint of that inescapable disease...racism.

Yes, I said it, racism.

See, on the national stage, people are afraid to call this what it is, and the moment you say the word, a huge number of preconceptions arise around what I mean and where this discussion took a turn, but it is, plain and simple. Racism.

Just not your father's brand...

"How do you know?", some will ask. "You can't be sure..." others will say.

No, but while in life there is nothing you can be absolutely sure of...what is clear is that a segment of our country's citizens and elected officials show a blatant disrespect for the holder of an office that two years ago they would have burned you in effigy for merely disagreeing with, the difference is an African American now holds it. And there in lies the key to the riddle.

Like Bilbo's ring, the question of what is and what isn't in the pocket of what we call racism has so many definitions and connotations, that most people shut down when it's mentioned and can't examine the multifacet conundrum that it is.

Racism isn't just burning crosses and race riots, it has transformed and adapted into a quieter, subtler form of the same virulent strain: it is the quiet decision to redistrict and redistribute resources, it is the glass ceiling never shattered, the casual difference in the way people act around different groups, it is a blatant disregard for the office and the authority of the leader of our country. The sheets may have been traded in (well some of the sheets) for business suits, congressional pins and "News" shows, but no matter how much it has changed, the game has remained the same...fear.

We have come so far as a country...crossing racial and cultural boundaries in life, in love, in purpose...the youth today don't see the racial divisions our parents grew up with amongst their friends, corporations engage the communities once oppressed with social conscience and commitment and for the first time in our history, citizens rally around causes ignoring cultural divides, and a person of color is elected to the highest office in the land.

And yet, I am ashamed, because as a country, we have failed. We have failed because we have allowed the least of us, to co-opt our country in an immoral way and stand idly by while they spout lies.

Charlatans and con artists with little to espouse other than hate broadcast it on the airwaves and call it free speech. Manipulators work behind the scenes to organize opposition and stage protests and call it a movement. Scripted pretenders arrive at town halls to read their lines and we call them hard working, honest Americans...and we stand idly by while they pump bile and poison into our life.

We must expect better, we must do better, we must be better. Disagreement and discourse are a part of politics and the American way of life, but without respect, without honorable action, without truth it is little more than pseudo intellectual slam dancing. We are a great nation, but we can be greater. And to do that, we must be a country that puts truth and justice ahead of profit and property and we must shine a beacon on deception and call out those who would hide behind falsehoods and fearmongering.

We must speak truth to power and hold to the light those who would drape their bias and prejudices in scare tactics. We must stay the course as we forge ahead towards a new national conscience of principled idealism. We must cast of these last vestiges or bleaker times and forge ahead bringing the best of us to bear on improving our world, and rising from the ashes of intolerance like a Phoenix onto a new land bringing with it the (Re)Birth of a Nation.

Amen.

30 Days of Night or the Allegory of the McCain Campaign

2008-10-04T00:29:00.000-07:00

Today, I'm going to mix things up a bit and review movies instead. We're 30 days out so this seems apropos.

30 Days of Night is a film adaptation of a graphic novel set in Alaska. The plot surrounds a group of vampires who descend on Alaskan towns during the period of Winter when the sun is absent for 30 days and feast on the people living there...

I didn't say there was any similarities....

All I'm saying is that the story has an Alaskan connection and talks about blood thirsty undead who systematically descend upon and destroy innocent, hardworking people by sucking their blood and rending them limb from limb...or garnering a $700B bailout strategy...

Now that's Straight Talk!

Now let's break this movie down a bit and tell me if any of this sounds familiar. So you have this sleepy little town of Barrow (America)
that annually goes through a period where the sun doesn't shine (elections). People who don't want to put up with it leave for other parts (Canada). A stranger, essentially the Vampire Cabal (RNC) front man (W) lays the groundwork by sabotaging the town (destroys all cell phones, breaks the helicopters, kills all the dogs, gets us into a war on false pretenses).

Now the local Sheriff (John McCain) .starts off investigating all these things when the campai- I mean killing starts And a small group of survivors (Romney, Huckabee, Guiliani and the other candidates end up holed up in an abandoned houses and buildings (Ohio and other primary states) trying to survive and figure out their next move. A few things happened, one of the survivors is a senile old man who runs off into the night followed by his son and gets killed (this is either Ron Paul or Fred Thompson, it's hard to be sure...). They stay holed up, even when the vampires enlist a young woman to use as bait. (Sarah Palin) Of course, she's stupid enough to think that the vampires will let her go if she goes along with this, and of course tries to coax other people out to be killed...

Realizing that the only way he can beat them is to join them, the Sheriff (McCain) injects himself with vampire blood (accepts the nomination) and faces off against the vampire leader (Karl Rove). He turns into a vampire (have you seen some of his speeches and ads lately????) but does it to save the town (thus confirming my theory that John McCain is secretly supporting Barack Obama). In the end he watches the Sun rise (Barack) and slowly disintegrates into dust (see November 5, 2008).

I think it's beautiful when art imitates life, and fascinating when life imitates politics.

Strangely enough, Wesley Snipes has played Blade, a half human, half vampire superhero who has all of the strengths and none of their weaknesses and has dedicated his life to destroying vampires...he even has older partner named Whistler (Kris Kristofferson) who's been fighting vampires longer than him and mentors and aids Blade in a supporting role...

Ironic huh?

The American Dream? Part 1

2008-09-21T17:22:00.000-07:00

Unbeknownst to me,
the world had changed.

Gone were the carefree days of my youth,
afternoons spent dreaming of young girls in sundresses,
plans for the future as a rock star or president of the u.s.

The mindset had changed;
the people didn’t feel the same;
the magic was gone.........

Never again would we bask in the sun,
unafraid of what the day would bring,
believing that in America, anything was possible.

Who was I to remind them of their forgotten ideals,
of the truth and principles that we supposedly fought so had for,
of the evils perpetuated in the name of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness?

Who would listen to a small voice which cried out from the pit of darkness,
ever encroaching in from the sides,
consuming the life from a once vibrant populace?

America, America, God shed his grace on thee,
and crown thy Good, with Brotherhood......
But what happens when there is none to wear the crown?

Is it a Black thing? Is it a Hispanic thing? Is it a White thing?
Perhaps it is a Justice thing, a Righteous thing, a Good thing!
Supposedly, it was an American thing!

Rodney King, Auschwitz, Columbus, Egypt, Hong Kong.
How long do the lies and extermination have to last,
ingrained in the minds of our children before we wake up?

"We hold these truths to be self evident; that all men are created equal....."
Does someone not understand the definition of self? Of evident? Or is it equal?
Perhaps the confusion centers around the phrase “all men” and who defined it.

It is well and good to support our country, to have pride in our troops,
to celebrate the 4th of July, and Washington’s birthday;
but what happens when you find out you’ve been celebrating a lie?

I do not hate America.

I believe in American ideals.

I believe in the American people!

I believe that
when in the course of human events
it becomes necessary,
a nation must rise up
and defend itself
from tyranny,
injustice,
and oppression

but we can’t feed
and clothe
and heal
and protect
the very people
who comprise
this greatest of nations.

Where are the priorities,
where is the truth,
the righteousness?

Where is the country that
"four-score and seven years ago
our forefathers brought"?

Where is America,
land of the free,
home of the brave,
nation among nations?

Hopefully preparing for a rebirth
that will insure that
all PEOPLE are created equal

and are endowed
with the Rights
to Life,
to Liberty,
and to the Pursuit of Happiness....

from sea to shining sea...

Amen.

Eating Obama Waffles or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love The Racist

2008-09-16T18:13:00.000-07:00

Just when you thought it was safe to wade back into the water, along comes Obama Waffles, brainfart of Matt Whitlock and Bob DeMoss, two Right Wing Christian Romance book writers who have worked for Focus on the Family(FOF).

Ahhh, Southern Right Wing Born Agains...imagine my surprise.

You know, in the good old days, bigots would wear white sheets or brown shirts, burn crosses in your yard or paint swastikas on your fence and shout racial epithets. There was no gray area. They made it clear, in no uncertain terms, that they hated you, you weren't welcome, and they would simply gerrymander your district and sick police dogs on you rather than hide behind the guise of "political satire" like some Larry Craigesque denial that everyone sees through except them.

Punks.

See, if you're really going to be "brave" enough to put yourself out there, don't try and hide it. "Say it loud: I'm bigoted and I'm proud!" Let the world know that you still live in an outmoded idea that White people are better than everyone else and it's okay to demean and belittle race and culture as long as you put quotes around it. You're funny and hip. We have Eminem now so it's alright to use the N-word. Of course when it turns out that you actually work for Fox, I guess I shouldn't be surprised.

I'll say it again. Punks.

Not because they have a bigoted perspective, that's okay. Racist, sexist, xenophobic people have everyright to exist in the Republican Party and anywhere else. It's the hypocrisy that kills me. The idea that you can talk about terrorists as the enemy when you have actual religious extremists like Whitlock and DeMoss (with Rupert Murdoch) funneling their particular brand of "antebellum wisdom" couched as frat boy "humor" when in actuality it is the unique brand of fundamentalist ideaology that allows its members to participate in bigotry and prejudice while still claiming its Jesus' way...maybe this is why I'm a retired Catholic.

Where's George Carlin when you really need him?????

You know, it's been said ad nauseum: Hate is not a family value. But clearly for right wing idealogues, it is, because this kind of thing keeps rising up. My question is why?

Here at the Values Voter's Summit which was sponsored by FRCAction, the lobbying arm of the Family Research Council and featured such confirmed speakers as Phyllis Schlafly, Lou Dobbs and of course, hometown favorite, Michelle Bachman (who the hell was scraping the barrel to put Stephen Baldwin on the agenda), it only took THREE days to realize that selling the breakfast of racist champions might not be a very "value driven" prospect...talk about things that make you go hmmm....

Going back the entrepreneur's "Roots" (pun intended), you look at FOF's mission statement:

To cooperate with the Holy Spirit in sharing the Gospel of Jesus Christ with as many people as possible by nurturing and defending the God-ordained institution of the family and promoting biblical truths worldwide.

Leaving aside for a minute the typical argument of FOF regarding what constitutes a family, help me understand where debasing people, hate speech and breeding intolerance is in that mission? Is it just a different definition of "Holy Spirit" or is there a Gospel that I'm not familiar with (After John and Paul did someone run across Letters from Ringo to the Ephesians and forget to mention it to the rest of us?).

James D., help a brother out here. You consider yourself a religious man, you promote your organization as one who's primary function is to spread the Gospel of Jesus, where does bigotry come in? Which passage in the Bible, which lesson in Proverbs or Psalms speaks to hate speech? How is it spreading the Gospel to be derisive? I'm pretty sure this would fall under the guise of "bearing false witness" in some respect, or given the way that Whitlock and DeMoss are posturing, I'm sure that Pride, deadliest of the Seven Deadly Sins is in there somewhere...

Even better though is the FRC which was founded in 1983 as an organization dedicated to the promotion of marriage and family and the sanctity of human life in national policy...When did marriage end up on the clearance rack? You have an organization dedicated to the promotion of marriage and family like it's on the back shelf and you need to make sure that they're "priced to move" before they go bad...I'm pretty sure they don't need the extra PR. Of course that whole "sanctity of human life" thing takes a dive when it comes to the death penalty. Sure, in their position statement regarding life, it says that the FRC "recognizes and respects the inherent dignity of every human life from conception (whether by natural or artificial means) until death. FRC desires to help build a culture of life, holding that all human life is a gift to be treasured. The life of every human being is an intrinsic good, not something whose value is conditional upon its usefulness to others or to the state....

...which would kind of seem to conflict with the position statement of theirs on capital punishment which says:

The [FRC], mindful of the strongly held and often conflicting views of many of our constituents on this important question, has never taken a definitive position for or against capital punishment.

FRC's Board of Directors and staff wholly recognize and independently grapple with the central question pertaining to the death penalty: Can capital punishment be morally justified? Needless to say, a consensus within FRC has never been reached regarding the moral permissibility of capital punishment.

Hypocrisy, thy name is FRC.

But back to the main points: Bigotry and Hypocrisy. Now I know I'm usually a little more upbeat and mirthful, but we've come to a point where we as nation must learn how to say enough is enough. We have gorged ourselves on reality tv and sanctimonious drivel with pundits who tell us it's okay to be bigoted, that it's just being an American...the original Maverick (well if you look at it, a gambling, fast talking cowboy who was always reluctant to put himself into harms way) and not that we have to better than that.

We have to be better than that.

We have to stand for something more than winning at all costs and the Cheney-style ends justify the means.

We have to be above petty derision and stand for things like honor, integrity and honesty.

Regardless of who you support or where you fall in the political spectrum, if your platform is strong, if your ideas are right and have merit, then you shouldn't need to sink to cheap parlor tricks and bigoted humor and scare tactics in order to win an election. But most of all, we cannot stand idly by while others do this. We cannot allow the hypocritical and disingenous idealogues to march across our airwaves and hearts unchallenged (yeah I'm talking about you Scarborough, Limbaugh and Hannity...oh and Colmes, grow a pair!). We are in a battle for the soul of not just our country, but for our very principles, spirit and standing in the world. For if we lay down and die, if we go gentle into that good night, all of what we are and what we've fought for will have been for naught.

We're Americans and it's time we started acting like it.

Tina Fey comes out swinging as new TV character...the VP

2008-09-04T22:23:00.000-07:00

I have always liked Saturday Night Live from the early days in the 70s. Sure it's had some ups and downs (Joe Piscopo as the talent????), but it's lasted through out the years. One of the funniest segments has always been the News and not since Chevy Chase have we had someone as witty and creative as Tina Fey. I've really enjoyed her project, 30 Rock, and now she's catapulted back on to the National stage with a character that's a bit of stretch for her because of how bitchy and snarky she is while smiling smugly. Tina takes on her new role as Sarah Palin, an upstart political ploy and placation to women across the country, with sass and spunk to compensate for the hypocrisy of inexperience and absence of positions. She starts--

What?

What do you mean that's not Tina Fey? Is it Julia Louis-Dreyfus?

What?!?!?!?

THIS IS REAL????

Okay, someone explain who's smoking crack over at the RNC. Is Karl Rove pinching Rush Limbaugh's oxycontin???

In what can only be described as a sadomasochistic fever dream, the Republicans have selected Palin as their VP and on Wednesday night she, and a host of others, gave their junior high "in crowd" speeches. Normally, I'm very supportive of different political idealogies but after listening to the Molly Ringwald wannabes on Wednesday, the kid gloves are off.

Now the warm up act was Rudy "How Many Times Can I Invoke 9-11 in a sentence" Guiliani. With all the vim and vigor of the drunk uncle at the family reunion, Rudy gave his biting jabs with such stellar points as Barack has never run a city, never run a state, never run a business...apparently someone forgot to tell him that neither had McCain, his own nominee...

"Hello Pot? Yeah, this is the Kettle. You're black."

Oh and speaking of Black, you know that the world has spun off its axis when the RNC plays the Race card: "We began as a party dedicated to freeing people from slavery ... And we are still the party that is willing to fight for freedom at home and around the world. We are the party that wants to expand individual freedom and economic freedom ..."

Ah yes, the Party of Lincoln...unnnntil they dropkicked him to the curb in the middle of the Civil War and he formed his own party to get (successfully) re-elected in 1864 (National Union Party). A lot can change in 154 years... we no longer have Slavery, women have the right to vote, television and the Republican party has "flip flopped" so hard on its founding principles and where it came from you'd think Michael Jackson was the head of the RNC...but I digress.

Leaving aside that they must be working under a different definition of "freedom", "at home" and "around the world", they decided to pull Tina Fe- I'm sorry, Sarah Palin, out of a magic hat as a means of showing they're liberated and open...apparently no one was looking at the demographics and membership at the convention this week. I have seen a lack of diversity that great since the Idaho Grand Wizard Mayonnaise Festival and Grammar Jamboree, featuring Michael Bolton and Kenny G...but again, I digress.

People wonder what the draw and appeal is about Palin, and I think it's revealed in her speech...she is, in fact, a human talking point. She can invoke 9-11 and speak to the party's commitment to the war because her son and nephew are shipping out for Iraq (someone remind me when the tour of service was up for the Bush Twins...). She can laud her executive experience as mayor of a town that's just double the population of my alma mater, Morehouse College...in fact, the University of MN has about 7 times as many students as the population of Wasilla...does that mean Bob Bruinicks is more qualified to be the VP?

And keeping the executive experience, for the past 20 months she's been governor of the 47th most populated state...that's out of 50. For those of you keeping score on the home game, that's about 7% of the state of New Jersey or half the Bronx--just to put it in perspective. Of course, if she could actually handle the Bronx, I might have a little more respect for her...of course that would require her to actually have seen a brown person, and since Minnesota at ten times the population has more brown people, I'm thinking you can cross that off the list.

But the greatest pandering comes to special needs and family values crowds. Given that she and her sister both have special needs children, I have no doubt that she cares about the issues of special needs children...as long as you're just talking about her family. After watching the hypocrisy of the RNC being anti GLBT rights...except when it comes to Cheney's daughter, pro-abstinence, except when it comes to Palin's daughter, anti-drug, except when it comes to Rush Limbaugh, and pro-military...until it comes to the Bush Family and others, I'm pretty sure that while she did pledge that if they were elected, people would have a friend and advocate in the White House...she just didn't say it would be her.

But, I think the nicest part was the televised dump on the backbone of nonprofit and community organizations...the organizer. Perhaps it's because she hasn't had to work her way up or been in a true urban setting, she doesn't understand how challenging being a community organizer is and what one has to do. Hell, just being Black in America is a challenge, job, struggle and joy all in one feel swoop, add in real urban experience and there isn't any comparison...it's like the difference between shooting a bullet and throwing it.

Of course I did get a chuckle out of her criticizing Barack for scenery while she stood in front of a 30ft video screen showing scenery from around the country...I guess they don't get green screen in Alaska.

Now, it's nice that McCain got himself a cheerleader/librarian from Showtime After Hours, but this is a serious time and we need real commitment and real leadershp. and Barack fits the bill.

John McCain DOES Care About Black People...

2008-09-02T16:57:00.000-07:00

I've figured it out!

....
I've have been baffled by the McCain campaign, especially over the last 6 months. This is the man who served and suffered for our country as a naval aviator and POW, reached across the aisle to co-sponsor and champion campaign finance reform with the McCain-Feingold Act, launched the Straight Talk Express and had many successful (and funny, I mean, REALLY funny) appearances on my favorite, The Daily Show...if I didn't know better I'd swear he was either Captain America or Rambo or both.

But over the course of this campaign season, things have mystified me and I've tried to figure out WTF????

Singing "Bomb, bomb, bomb ... Bomb, bomb Iran" to the tune of the Beach Boys "Barbara Ann"; mixing up Somalia and Sudan or the Packers and the Steelers; and you'd be hard pressed to find a clearer way to say "all those people look alike" than the whole Sunni/Shia constant confusion...

But I finally figured it out...with apologies to Kanye West,

John McCain Does Care About Black People!

He really does. And he cares about one special one in particular...Barack Obama, whom he's secretly supporting for President...

Yes I said it.

It's the only explanation. Think about it. In 1983 he begins laying the groundwork by opposing the Martin Luther King Holiday and then continues to distance himself or ignore the Black Community in his state; in 2000 he lost to the Bush campaign, placing arguably the worst president in history in office, whom he subsequently endorsed in 2004, thereby continuing to galvanize Americans to action; and now in a continuation of this plan, he picks a relatively unknown governor to be VP, with none of the experience that he claims Barack doesn't have, all because she's a woman--thinking this will somehow mobilize the Hillary camp and women across the country to support him...you know, you couldn't ask for a more perfect straight line if you had Lou Abbott explaining Who's On First.

Follow me on this.

We live in a country that has struggled with its issues of race, culture and class in regards to basic human rights since its inception: slavery and segregation, equal rights for women, immigration, homelessness, gay marriage, the list goes on and on. And throughout any conflict, there is always a good guy and a bad guy...and it can't just be, "Oh, yes, I'm the best, but the other guy's okay too...no Kennedy needs his Nixon, Holmes needs his Moriarty, the American people need their Dick Cheney and Superman needs his Lex Luthor...hmmm, John McCain is balding...

And how better to be that guy than to constantly place yourself opposite the hero and to do such idyllic things as to consistently exemplify hypocrisy? I mean really. McCain is tuned into the homelessness and the foreclosure crisis so much that he doesn't remember how many homes he has...he's lost his homes too. He is so ahead of the game against segregation and racism that he can't tell brown people apart...that's being colorblind my friend. And now he's so supportive of women that he picks the antithesis of Hillary for his ticket to draw in her supporters based on gender...hmmm, I can't imagine thinking that little of women's intelligence...

And don't even get me started on the family dynamics. Personally, I believe that people's personal lives should be left alone and out of it, but you have to subscribe to that belief too to get that consideration, and so conversely it's hard to preach abstinence and "family values" as a party platform when your candidate has had extramarital affairs and your prospective VP's underaged, unwed daughter is pregnant...(of course there is hope, her boyfriend's coming to the convention...why???) And, I'm definitely one for unique names, but will foreign heads of state really take us more serious if they think the Palin named her kids after characters from Buffy and Charmed???

Maybe a press release about Piper Cubs and Willow, Alaska...although I don't know how to explain a kid named Trig...

Or maybe, this can be start of a trend with the party that they begin respecting the rights of all people to have their lives the way they want them...

The stage has been set. Bush has run the country so far into the ground that people are ready for radical change. And McCain has set himself up as the perfect contrast to Barack. And that's why it's clear...John McCain DOES care about Black people, and he wants one of them to be our next president......Barack Obama.

Really, can you think of a better explanation?

Core Values

2008-08-26T22:41:00.000-07:00

Part of what I'm doing on this journey is a program that teaches participants about renewal. Finding that center that keeps you focused.

One of the early parts of this was defining our core values and I've been musing about them.

My three core values that I've decided to focus on are:

Honor/Integrity-I have grouped these two together because I believe that there are intertwined to the point of looking similar but still have distinct differences. Both deal with the basic principle of "saying what you mean and meaning what you say", but I think Integrity deals with how you do things and Honor deals with why. In both I am striving to live a purposeful life that focuses on "doing the right thing", which is often a moving target between people, but within on deals with a specific code of ethics and morals. I follow my code to do what I think is right, strive to do no harm and be willing to accept the consequences, regardless of what they may be, for this path.

Discipline-"Argue for your limitations, and sure enough, they are yours."~Illusions by Richard Bach. I have a rather dichitomous approach to this that I am working to simplify in that when it comes to doing the things that affect others, I'm very good. When it comes to things affecting only me...well I need a little work. Discipline is adhering to the course I set out for myself and it is much easier to do when someone else is dependent upon me than when it is only for myself and I'm working to make this consistent.

Compassion-Justice, standards and rules must be tempered by compassion, consideration for the circumstances and perspective of others. I have my own perspective and code, and I live it purposely to the point of seeming obstinate sometimes, but I am ALWAYS willing to hear another perspective, viewpoint or opinion. I am less receptive if a person is cruel, dishonest or domineering--if you aren't willing to work with me and talk as adults open to discussion, I have less sympathy, but compassion allows for circumstances and perhaps provides some extra room for negotiation.

Lastly, I submit for those who don't know it one of my favorite pieces, Desiderata. It reminds me, when I feel lost, where the path is and how to get back on.

Jonathan

Desiderata

Go placidly amid the noise and the haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible without surrender be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even to the dull and the ignorant, they too have their story. Avoid loud and aggressive persons, they are vexations to the spirit.~

If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter; for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself. Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.~

Exercise caution in your business affairs, for the world is full of trickery. But let not this blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals, and everywhere life is full of heroism. Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is as perennial as the grass. ~

Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth.Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness. Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. ~

You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.Therefore, be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be. And whatever your labors and aspirations in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul. With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams; it is still a beautiful world.

Be careful.Strive to be happy.

Things that make you go hmmm....

2008-08-18T17:57:00.000-07:00

So, this was in the Sunday comics...how perfect is that?

Of course it makes you think, sometimes things come in ways and shapes that you don't expect and you have to "cooperate with the inevitable" as Jubal Harshaw would say...

Points if you got the reference.

Bonus points if you understood the meaning.

Sometimes when you're not looking for something it comes raining down on you like sulfur in a biblical story, other times when the thing you've envisioned shows, you can't be surprised at the form it takes.

You have to just enjoy the ride and the wonder...

Back on the Block...

2008-08-17T23:00:00.000-07:00

Well, it's been awhile...

A little over two years to be exact, and I'm not certain what has lead me to come back here, but I have a pretty good idea.

But to bring up to speed, here's the dream sequence recap to bring anyone who needs it up to speed.

12 Months ago

I launched a campaign to run for office, shortly after running my first physical race in my life.

9 Months ago

With my program phasing down, I leave the EZ to focus on my campaign. I also begin the Shannon Institute Leadership Program.

5 Months ago

There is no endorsement in my race and decide to end my campaign while I begin a new position as Executive Director of Hallie Q. Brown Community Center.

1 Month ago

I go to see "The Dark Knight" and prophetically enough, my life changes forever and for good...really good.

Which brings us to where we are today...living the dream. I've often said that age does not necessitate wisdom, but in addition to that it does grant perspective...I look at where my life is today and where it was 2 and 10 years ago and some things never change...and yet some things do...

Coming Home

2006-03-17T12:09:00.000-08:00

Today was a good day.

Today, I stood on the ground where my forefathers stood.

I stood in the middle of the square, breathed deep, and let the feeling of history wash over me...

I left out this morning and drove up to Dunkeld, not really knowing what to expect. I'd hit a dead end at the General Register Office (GRO) and decided that the best way to make some headway was to just go to where we were from and see if I couldn't figure it out. Before I left, I did some research and found that the records were actually more likely to be found at the Tayside Family History Center in Dundee, but decided to go anyway...most likely because that's the way I do things, just dive in and see what stroke I come up with while swimming...and dive in I did.

Dunkeld is a small little town right next to Birnam which seems a little bigger, but essentially the same kind of place. Each has a main street with shops, restaurants and hotels, and then homes and religious/historical buildings off the strip...except for the fact that they whole place is historical...past fiefdoms ruled by Dukes and other leaders. And I use "home" in the purely general sense...more cottages and what would be apts or condos if they weren't one to two hundred years old....

I went down to the visitor's center and talked with the staff person and there made one of the most fascinating discoveries. Now here in Scotland, since things are so small that houses, streets and buildings often don't have numbers but rather names, or are used interchangably. All this time I had been researching, I kept coming up with people being born at "The Cross", which I'd thought was a hospital or convent. It turns out that the Cross was actually named for the "cul-de-sac" that held the cross market, and would have been the area of town where people came to sell their wares and trade. It was the small sections of houses that was a region of this small little village, like Georgetown or Uptown.

What was more incredible was that I was standing in the middle of it.

Yes, the information center was in the small section that was called the Cross, and so here I stood coming to this revelation and realizing I was right where my ancestors had been. I was standing on the soil they would have played as young children, learned their lessons, had their first kiss, grown to adulthood and toiled at their labours, and yes, even died. I was right where those who had come before me had stood.

I was home.

Next we began to look through the grave marker books to see who had been buried that might rise to the occasion of fitting the relative bill. This only produced more challenges and questions, because while I couldn't find a definitive connection to those I knew lived and died there, I found so many others with the same name....with the same spelling..and the variations...and so while I have yet to find that definitive connection, I cannot believe that these other McFarlanes (MacFarlanes) were not related closely in some manner. We are all members of the Clan, but there seems to be no way that so many from the family could be living in such a small place and not be connected....

My course is clear, and I take up the new challenge joyfully.

2006-03-16T22:30:00.000-08:00

So now, after getting my legs reattached, I got up and moved around for a bit. Whew!

So today I was going to meet Brian MacFarlane in Dumferline where he lives. It was my first meeting of another officer of the Society, so I was quite excited. We decided to get together at 7:00pm, so I figured I'd make a quick jaunt up there early afternoon and look around the town (a lot of historical stuff) before going over to Brian's house. I also wanted to head out early to make sure I could find everything.

Unfortunately, I decided to make some stops in town. Went into this comic store that for some reason is always closed when I get there in the evening, so I finally hit it in the day. It has a wealth of fun products but I was dissapointed not to find a lot of "British" comic stuff. Ended up getting some fun gifts for some friends (you know who you are) and a parking ticket. (What the f-???) So, since I had the ticket, I went and had lunch, bought so more souvenirs, and finally headed out around 4pm.

WHO THE HELL PLANNED THE ROADS?????

I couldn't get on the damn A90! Every time I turned down a street that was supposed to connect on the map, it ended up being a one-way, or not a thru street, or some idiot had put up iron barriers?????? Who does this cruel trick to visitors???? It took me 45 minutes just to get out of Edinburgh!

So I finally get on the road and find Dumferline. It's a nice quaint place. Tomorrow more about meeting Brian!

Coronaries and Cakewalks

2006-03-15T20:05:00.000-08:00

Day 2

Our hero, having fully recovered from his dramatically reduced caffeine intake and overwhelming jetlag, launches out at the brave hour of 12:30pm into the day...nothing can stop him.

Okay, so I needed some rest, but that's what vacations are for, so I took it. I feel a little like Arlo Guthrie without the Thanksgiving Dinner.

So once, the day had begun, I decided to head over to the General Register Office (GRO) to try and confirm research before I headed anywhere. Now I don't know if they switched things on my or what, but I remember there being more information on the computer than there seemed to be. No matter, though. No matter how much I tried, I couldn't pull up records corresponding with family from the mid 1800s. It was getting pretty frustrating, so I decided to go into the round room, and pull some of the microfiched and filmed records. I took a chance that the same record number would correspond for previous years, and as luck would have it found both the 1841 and 1851 censuses (censui? Sensei?) which confirmed the birth order of my great great ather and the time period of the death of my great great great grandmother. As luck would also have it, I think that I found her parents...and it looks like her mother was a MacFarlane! I still need to confirm some things, but it's still very fascinating.

So after finishing the record search, I decided to take a quick drive and ended up in Holyrood Park. It seemed pretty nice and was still light (about 4:30pm) so I took a walk and a small climb (which actually turned out to be a big climb) up to St. Andrew's Chapel ruins at the top of the hill. It was quite exhilarating and tiring. But once I got to the top, the view was great and it was a fascinating piece of history. Interesting enough that I decided to go over to the second ridge which were the remains of one of the fort barricades. Again, not too bad, but a bit longer than I expected.

Once I got there, I realized that what I had mistakenly thought was Arthur's Seat, was actually the Parliament (no one had every really pointed it out or described it, just kind of gestured in that direction), and the big ass hill behind me was actually Arthur's Seat.

Well, I'm on Holiday.
And I'm in Scotland.
And I'm a guy.

So naturally I decided to climb it......crack smoker!

It wasn't bad enough that I decided to venture that way, but after walked the mile along the precious ridge to the base, I also decided that it would be "fun" (FUN?!?!?!?) to climb the face rather than walking the "path" (more on that lie in a moment). So here in Scotland for one day, recovering from ankle surgery, and about as in shape as Marlon Brando after Oktoberfest, I began to scale the peak.

Who made this thing?!?!? It's deceptively taller than it seems when you first get under way. My God! And those aren't footholds. They're pockmarks. Wet, slippery, muddy pockmarks that don't provide you any traction, but rather allow you to slip back two feet while you struggle to regain your balance while keeping the camera clean.

Luckily, right before the coronary kicked in, I made it to the top. Now, I will admit that the view is breathtaking. And on a clear day, you could probably see Glasgow. It was well worth it, and I enjoyed it once I was at the top, but man what a climb!

Then there was the journey back down, where the "path" actually isn't, and you keep slipping into nooks and crannies that are filled with more mud. I thought going down would be easier, but instead it seemed a lot harder. At one point I was tempted to just lie on my side and role down the hill.....but then I remembered that I had the cameras.

Oh well, after this I headed back to the hotel, showered and found a quick bite before resting for the evening. More tomorrow.

The Return of the Man

2006-03-14T15:57:00.000-08:00

Day 1

Have arrived in Scotland...so tired...must sleep. Will write later......

Scotland - Day 3-Falkirk

2004-12-12T21:41:00.000-08:00

Okay, what the hell is up with the whole urban planning thing over here???? It's like you have to walk EVERYWHERE! I mean I'm okay with a brisk stroll every now and then, but it's like they had no other plans....just walking. Everywhere you go, you have to park a mile away, and then when you get to the spots, it's like something out of some twisted psychotic Denise Richards workout video. "Here, welcome to the monument, you have to climb the two hundred and sixty steps to get to the top and view it....-oh oh, but that's after you take the 1 mile and a half sloping path at a 65 degree angle that winds around the cliff that we're on....oh c'mon and buck up...just think of the cardio workout you're getting. What? No we don't have any defribilators. Why?"

So Sunday, I decide to light out for Stirling to visit the castle, and battleground and Wallace monument. Pop into the the little Corsa (that's the car I have, think of a Geo Metro merged with a Plymouth Roadster.) and light off for Stirling. In my head I can see visions of warrior poets charging the fields at Bannockburn, and hear a Scottish brogue speak, "I shall tell you of William Wallace..." Having finally figured out what to do in the damn roundabouts, I'm set.

And I'm driving, pleasant day. It's about 11:30am so there's still plenty of sunlight. And I notice Falkirk's on the way. So I figure, I'll pop off over there, and see what memorials they have. Not Scotland's not like the US where we have things like street signs (I'll come back to that), but they do have pretty good directions for the monuments. Unfortunately they don't have a description of what the monuments are. So I'm heading to Falkirk and they keep having signs for the "Falkirk Wheel", which I've never heard off, but okay. Maybe it's like the round table or some ancient celtic ceremonial piece. So I follow the signs (because it would be too much to put the distance on them) and finally get to the parking lot....which is like 5 miles from the damn thing...okay it was more like .5, but it was on an incline!

The Falkirk Wheel, it turns out, is a marvel of engineering. It's the latest in modern canal connection. Instead of having a boat go through a series of locks with spillways and water levels, the Wheel simply rotates the ship from one level to another on the "Wheel". It's pretty fascinating and a big attraction. I enjoyed watching it go for awhile and then upon leaving got to watch as a boat was let through the mini canal I had crossed on my way in. There's a manual opening bridge that a person opens up to let boats travel through. I also got some good pictures of swans swimming and looking for food.

And then it was back into the car, disappointed at not finding any kind of a battlefield memorial, but satiated by the magic that is the Falkirk Wheel.

DAY 2 -Evening

2004-12-11T23:59:00.000-08:00

Saturday night's gonna be alright, gonna be, it's gonna be alright now baby...it is if I can get out this damn bed.

Into the second day without Red Bull, and I can feel its effects. Low energy, hard to concentrate, what are all these people talking about? It's when you don't drink the stuff that you suffer.

Finally was able to drag myself out of the nap phase about a 1/2 hour before I'm supposed to meet Colm and Lauren. Lauren's friends Phil and Susanna are joining us too. Head out to a place called (of all things) the Brass Monkey...I was just hoping they wouldn't be playing the Beastie Boys when I got there.....

Found Lauren and Co. in the back room and proceeded to try Stella, another Scottish Lager. Quite good and tasty. Colm showed up and we began to trade stories, jokes and whimsical comments. It was interesting sitting in this pub with these friends. One of the things you come increasing cognizant of is that, just like in MN or the South, you're often the only Black person in the room, difference is here no one says anything about it...instead you can tell they notice you're American, but again, to their credit, no one says anything about it. More interesting is that to these friends, it didn't matter and that's the kind of world it's good to be a part of. I mean look at the times that we're in, that a Black man can come to Scotland to trace his heritage and no one bats an eye....

The do spit takes instead.

So then Lauren and I decide to head out for dinner, everyone else has someplace they need to be. She's really hungry (mentions this a couple of time during drinking, and then apologizes for mentioning it) and it really excited about skipping the pizza joint she'd plan to take us to, and hitting her favorite Indian restaurant.

I mean REALLY excited...

and really hungry....

And we get there, she's practically dancing in the streets.....and it's vegetarian.

ALL vegetarian....

And I look at her and remember her saying how hungry she was, and I look at the menu, and it's all vegetarian....and I'm struggling with this one of those monkeys working with the block puzzle. I know these things fit together, I just can't seem to connect them....

really hungry...vegetarian restaurant.

Lauren eats meat, she's not a vegetarian. She's lactose intolerant, but not a vegetarian. I've got a number of friends who have become vegetarians and fooled themselves into believing that all those vegetables and cheese curds are satiating, but not generally meat eaters. So I'm trying to figure out where the joke is...and there isn't any...or maybe that's the joke, but she's entirely serious. So I'm trying to figure out where I'm going to go to get a real meal after this when the waiter comes....oh well, I think, I'll try and fill up on bread.

~Later~

Okay, I've got to admit the food was good....not the kind of things you do to fix "really hungry" but good nonetheless. If I was ever going to try and believe that twigs, berries and granola satisfied me. I'd go there.

Dropped Lauren off (funny, you couldn't even notice any weight distribution when she got out, will try and encourage her to eat real food more often) and headed back to the Hotel Ceilidh-Donia (such a lovely place, such a lovely place), where it turned out the owner and some friends (in addition to other people in the bar) were having a pint and invited me to join them. Nobody would let me by a round unfortunately, but we had a rousing good time...and that's a story for another time....

Scotland - Day 2

2004-12-11T16:12:00.000-08:00

I slept on it and yeah, I'm not leaving.

Slept on it a lot actually, didn't make it out the bed until 11:30am....but since we're six hours ahead, I got up early by Mpls time.

Made it out of bed, SSSed and wondered off into the town. Got a haggis stromboli from a little place, and then headed out to the Pentland Hills. Actually, I just got in the car and started driving and ended up there, but it was nice all the same. With no place particular to be, I just figured I'd drive around and find out where I find things interesting and ended up on a road with these constant big signs with a camera icon (black outline of what looked to be an old Polaroid), so I'm thinking this must be the way to the "Camera Obscura" which is in town....found out later that those are the traffic signs to let you know that police cameras are active. Luckily I wasn't speeding.

Followed the road for awhile heading towards this large hill which I assume had the "Camera Obscura" on it. When I arrived, I discovered it to be more of a farm and historical monument. Located at this site was the remains of Castle Law and an earth house...or more appropriately just the earth house, which is essentially an ancient form of cellar where food and such would have been stored under ground. The land was quite pretty though, and the Scottish Army trains on the grounds so at least it gets a lot of use.

More later after some rest.....

DAY 1 -Evening

2004-12-11T01:53:00.000-08:00

Okay so I got settled in, and wandered out and about. Found a little pub and got something to eat. On the one hand it's nice that no one bothers you, on the other it seems really lonely and sad.

Had a steak pie and a pint of McEwans and then wandered off into the night. The city is incredible...great stone buildings that you can feel the history in them as you walk by....reach out a hand and touch them and the sensory input is almost too much to bear.

Wandered around the city waiting to meet Lauren. Went down in the Meadows, and around the streets. Hit a few pubs with Lauren...you can't kick a rock in this town without hitting at least three.....and that's why I'm not going back! Ha-HA! I'll just have my clothes mailed to me and live in Edinburgh!

Maybe I should get some sleep before I make this decision....

Scotland - Day 1

2004-12-10T16:11:00.000-08:00

Well, I am in Scotland, ancestral homeland that it is, delving into the wonderful trip that I shall have.

Plane ride was not bad, the couple I was sitting next to, moved and I ended up with a whole row to myself. Don't know what I would have done, otherwise, who sits in these seats? Twiggy? I mean, I know I'm no small man, but my shoulders aren't fat. Shouldn't they be able to fit into the seat? Instead I start off like some Aero-Luge athlete with my hands and arms at their side...can a brother get an arm rest?

So I spent the flight sleeping and watching the Bourne Supremecy, which I'd brought with me.....and thank God for that! I mean the movie on the flight was Planes, Trains and Automobiles....what is that like 20 years ago...what about something at least from the 90s? Then they moved int0 television with reruns of Fraiser and som sitcom about a female vicar....what's humorous about that????

So we land, I collect my luggage. Head through customs, get my bags, and just about to leave the airport (going through the "nothing to declare" line) when I get profiled by the transit agents. Now, I'm the only black guy on the flight and I'm in a suit, so I can only assume that either they thought I was a terrorist or an American (many are really pissed off at our country believe it or not). Given my demeanor, I'd have to go with the latter. Thanks a lot W!

So he asks me the standards of where I'm coming from, how long I'm going to be in the country, etc. Yada Yada, but then he starts getting more and more detailed....where was I staying, why was I staying at different hotels, who made the reservations, would I be open to new experiences in a foreign land with man in authority.....okay I made the last one up, but he was thinking it! You should have seen the way that he was checking me out!

Then I had a tremendous amount of fun time trying to get to the hotel, discerning the streets over here, they don't have signs on the corner, but rather on buildings that are on corners....sporadically! And sometimes they just change names, right in a block, similar to LaSalle/Blaisdell, but at least we have big signs announcing the change, not just "oh I'm an innocent foreigner driving along...huh, what the hell happen to the street???? It just changed na--it just did it again!!!" Spent an hour and a half driving around the same square mile trying to find things. I am convinced it's a plot by the Scottish Government to get back at me for W!

Well, that's it for now. I'll sign back in tomorrow with details of tonights excursions.

The beginning

2004-12-08T10:01:00.000-08:00

Many people ask, "who is this man, this fearless champion of justice, who struggles against great odds for the good of the common man? Who is he?".....

Well, not really, not a LOT of people, but some, yes some do. You betcha.

Okay, it was actually just one homeless guy on the corner who couldn't understand the amount of money I was giving him, but that's a start.

Who am I? Well, not a lot of people care, primarily because they don't know who the heck I am and how it relates to them. They've never met me, so why should they be concerned with my delusional ranting.....

But I digress.

And so, I begin this blog to do what everyone who creates one of these does....make a desperate plea for attention and acceptance in an increasingly cruel world that allows Farscape to go off the air, but Family Matters to run for like 10 seasons....whatupwidat????

So if you're bored, or desperate for entertainment or just trying to see what other fevered brains create...read on.